Unknown (via grrl-meat)
i want to print this out and give this to my mother.
I want to show this to everyone who has ever said any of those things to me.
I had a big, long rant prepared to post about how I feel about how things have been going lately, but I’m cutting it down to these cliff notes:
- The issue with DC and that misogyny has really opened my eyes to the many facets of how women are unappreciated and looked down upon in most creative industries, including as novelists.
- The massive amount of subtle and not-so-subtle misogyny and inequality in America in general makes me wonder how people can disregard women as a minority now.
- The rampant homophobia/other discrimination toward the LGBTQ community and racism, as well as mistreatment of disabled persons and other minorities, leaves me dumbfounded and ashamed to be an American. As does the continuing belief that being gay, etc, is a “choice” and a “lifestyle.”
- The fact that people still think it’s okay to use slurs of any kind also leaves me dumbfounded, especially when I hear the word “faggot” tossed around so casually by the kids I’m dealing with at this soccer camp.
- It’s probably going to take several generations for the current body image issues to lessen, and that’s being incredibly optimistic. Because there are still girls growing up and being bombarded with the message that “if you’re not thin, tan, and beautiful, no one will like you,” and they’re going to pass it onto their children. No number of plus-sized models is going to cancel out the fact that not fitting into the current ideal (whether you’re over or under weight) is not acceptable.
- The fact that my friends and I are always looked down upon for being overweight, regardless of how healthy, friendly, talented, and intelligent we may be is an illustration of that. I hate the fact that, because of that kind of indoctrination, I can’t look at myself in the mirror and not hate what I see- despite the fact that two guys have called me beautiful and dated me for being ME, or that other friends have pointed out all my good traits, I’ll still never be able to look into the mirror and see anything aside from my double chin and large thighs. I’m pretty sure it’s the same for many other people out there, and for a culture to do that- to rob people of their self-esteem just because they don’t fit the ideal of attractiveness- should be a crime.
- Legalizing gay marriage in New York is wonderful and amazing, but doesn’t make up for those kids who committed suicide last year. Or the ones killing themselves as you’re reading this. Or the ones whose lives will be ruined or destroyed because they can’t be accepted by others.
- The same goes for every other minority. Having a black president hasn’t helped racism. Having women gain more positions in power doesn’t change the fact that, overall, we are still viewed as inferior. Despite the fact that I have a female boss, my coworker and I are still brushed aside by our male counterparts not because our level of work is lesser, but because they don’t see anything wrong with assuming that it is.
- No matter how many female fans comics have, no matter how much support female writers and artists get from fans of all sexes, no matter how hard we may wish for it, female superheroes will always be objectified and women will always be disregarded for positions in comic companies.
And until this country changes, ladies and gentlemen, that is just the way things are going to be. At least in my eyes. You may go back to your regularly scheduled program now.
So. I’m cruising FB to see whose birthday it is today, and I saw a post from a woman that stopped me in my tracks. This woman, who will henceforth be known as “Grey,” is someone who graduated with my mother from High School and who I have known most of my life. She is stepmother to a childhood friend of mine (represented by a light green later on, though only once), though he lives out in Colorado most of the year, and I know her moderately well. Or, thought I did.
This particular post was about how she had seen a guy in a woman’s lingerie section and hoped that “he wasn’t a freak like a transvestite.” Of course, me being me, I couldn’t let this stand. I replied rather calmly, saying that you can’t really judge people overall like that, and that she should really find out more about them before calling them freaks. She proceeded to say worse and worse things about them until I posted this status below.
I WAS a smartass, I will say that much. And I will say that, for the following dialogue and this, I did not handle myself as professionally as I should have. But bear in mind this is a woman who I grew up with- someone I trusted, someone I liked- and I felt absolutely betrayed by her. Not only that, but she posts a threat to my interaction with my childhood friend’s entire FAMILY, all of whom I am friends with.
Here is the message she sent me, and my replies. She is grey, and I am blue (duh. XP)
I did not handle myself as well as I should have, and I do not know what this argument will mean for my future interactions with my childhood friend and his family. But I said what I wanted to say, and I suppose that’s all I COULD do.